'TIS THE SEASON!
Graham will make his Christmas pudding (865432 calories a sniff) which will then spend two months in the fridge until I decide “IT IS TIME” and toss it discreetly (or very theatrically depending on our relationship’s weather).
I’ll probably scramble to find him a present until Christmas Eve, when I’ll think of an ultimate experience of a lifetime he’ll never have the time to get to (last year was piloting a plane with his best friend)(the plane is still waiting)(TIP: if you want to save money for Christmas, offer fantastic experiences to busy people).
The kids will end up having a meltdown around the tree, which, because of hay allergy in the house, is not even a real one—the reason why I’ll be intoxicating the whole family with pine-scented candles.
Oh also, we just figured out our fireplace isn’t working.
Finally, my ultimate goal will be to spend as much time as humanely possible in my sweatpants selfishly thinking of all the things I’d like to achieve in the New Year instead of playing the dreaded “so bonding!” board games.
Many horoscopes will be read and vision boards envisioned, none that will come to fruition as I am still trying to figure out why my life path resembles a bitcoin stock market chart.
All this, so annoying, but that’s what makes the Holidays the Holidays. And it unfortunately seems that as I am maturing, even when I am trying to muster all of the French cynicism that I have left, I can’t help but letting the Holiday Spirit get hold of me.
Therefore, here I am with a mini Santa hat on my head and a red sweater.
So! I don’t know what you celebrating if anything at all—which is a fantastic choice too—but that’s what we will be doing. And because of the spirit, I thought of a few presents for you my lovely readers. Not a fantastic experience of a lifetime I promise, but the next best thing, uhuh—a few things to read and to listen to, from me to you.
Here they are!
1/ Here are three of my newsletters from 2022, free for you to read. I chose them not too revealing (I am extremely revealing in the private newsletter)(Graham would say "frighteningly revealing"), seeing as they’re out in the open, but I think you’ll definitely find the spirit of my writing.
2/ If you follow me on Instagram, you might have heard about it: I launched a podcast, and as a special “treat” for the Holidays, I decided to create a miniseries about the story of my life (who calls the story of their life a “special treat?" Well, none other than narcissist Garance Doré, obviously!) and how I found my way. For those of you who have followed me for years, this is literally the backstage story. For those of you who don’t know me, well, now you will, frighteningly!!!
Jokes aside, I’ve had amazing feedback about it and I hope you like it. Apparently it’s great to fall asleep to. That's a compliment, right? Ah!
3/ You know that I launched Doré this year, and it’s been so much bloody work for Emily an amazing experience, and we thought we could offer you a little something! We can’t do it for the millions of you who follow The Note (okay not millions but we’re starting to be quite a crowd!) but we wanted to make it super special. We are almost completely sold out of L'Ensemble, the beautiful collaboration we created with our friend Tina Frey, but I asked if we could keep one to gift to one of you :)
The only thing you need to do is sign up for Doré's newsletter, here!
Voilà for now! Leaving you now, as I have to go figure out if I’ll ever get my dress in time. Because yes, you won't believe it—I am soon to be married! (potentially, frighteningly naked). Me!!! Married!? Damn vision boards.
